Making A Connection

Who knew that being a part of the Stratham Community Church’s NEWS committee was going to be so exhilarating? When I first joined this team, it was solely so that, as webmaster of our church’s website, at www.strathamchurch.org , I would be able to find out about NEWS within the church, and thus be in a position to keep the website up-to-date. Little did I know that being on this committee brings its own trials and tribulations, the least of which happened just as we were “going to print” for this Holiday Issue of the Community Connection.

If things go as planned, the committee gets together on the first Wednesday of the month to plan the contents of the next month’s edition of the Connection. Throughout the next couple of weeks the members of the NEWS committee, (Pat Grahame – Chairperson; Irma Goodrich; Betty Batchelder; Susan Timmerman; and myself – Beti Turner as Editor) contact the various “movers and shakers” within our church, to solicit them for their latest and greatest tidbits of information, and details of upcoming events. These items are then submitted to the Editor (me) prior to the composition of the layout for the next edition. It usually runs pretty smoothly up to this point. The deadline is always the 21^st of the month, and usually we have pretty well everything we need by then – well, almost everything, at any rate!

The Monday before the first Sunday of the month, I finalize the layout, print out a proof copy for each member of the team, and distribute them. The team members read it and notify me of any errors. The worst error so far was when I inadvertently misspelled “sermon” – leaving out the “R”, in the sentence that should have read:

“in the absence of the Pastor, the sermon will be provided by Deacons.”

Unfortunately my spell checking software, on which I have come to strongly depend, thought that “semon” was a mis-spelling of what should have been “semen”. Thanks in no small part to my diligent proof-reading team, the error was caught and corrected before we “went to print”!

As soon as all errors have been corrected, usually around midnight on Tuesday, the final copy is ready for printing.

In a perfect world, I would be able to email the final document directly to the printer in the church office. But technology hasn’t yet figured out how to stop other people from using the printer at the same time as I need it, or how to reload the paper tray in the printer via an internet connection, nor how to reload the printer “ink” cartridge remotely – and herein lies another story – but more of that later!! (See overleaf!)

So, the next morning finds me copying the newsletter onto a CD on my home computer and driving it over to the church. There, I copy it onto the church computer, and print a single copy to ensure it still looks good. Ideally it would be all ready to go at this point, and I could leave, in the sure knowledge that our secretary would be able to monitor its printing progress, adding paper as necessary, and removing the piles of printed copy as she sees fit. But in fact, some “tweaking” is usually required, and I often end up staying at church for the entire day!

Once all Newsletters have been printed, we run the outer page through the computer one more time to add your names and addresses, ready for mailing. The finished copies are taken to the conference room where, usually at 12:30pm, the committee – plus, sometimes, some helpful volunteers – get together to fold, collate and prepare for mailing. At the end of the session, I take the trays of sorted newsletters over to the post office – and heave a sigh of relief. All is finished – until the following Wednesday, when we meet to plan the next edition, and it starts all over again.

This month, things seemed to be going more smoothly than usual, despite it being a “Double Issue” for December and January. We’d agreed to meet to collate at 2:00pm to give us extra time, ensuring it would be ready by then. Although I was late preparing the proof copy, by 8:00am this morning (Wednesday, Dec 3^rd) I was in the office, seated at the computer, printing the first “test” copy. Checking the copy carefully, I was gratified to see everything looked good. I printed the outer cover pages, and started the second page. The printer whirred away happily! I set the computer up for the final center pages, and told Helen – our secretary – that I was going to go home for lunch, and would be back at 2:00pm to collate. “No problem” replied Helen – “it’s going very well today, isn’t it?”

 “Don’t say that!” I said, “You’ll jinx it!” and I left. That was around 11:30am.

Shortly thereafter, the phone rang. It was Helen. “We’re having a bit of a problem with the printer” she said. “I don’t think we’ll be able to finish the Connection today.”

She went on to explain that the printer needed more ink, and she was having a terrible time refilling the cartridge. I suggested she call a couple of people who might be able to help her – since I’ve never refilled it on this printer myself, and knew it could potentially be tricky. It’s not the same as other laser printers.

Twenty minutes later, having finished my lunch I decided to call her to see if things were going OK. The phone was answered by a female voice who said “Oh! Hello – this is a church!”

“Helen?” I asked, thinking that this was not the “proper” way the phone should have been answered.

“No, I don’t think you can talk to Helen right now, she’s having a crisis!”

“Is it still the printer?” “Yes!”

“I’ll be right over” I said.

“I think that would be a good thing!” replied the mysterious stranger!

On arriving at church, I couldn’t stop myself from laughing. Poor Helen! The cartridge had got wedged into the printer incorrectly, and in doing so had literally exploded, exhaling huge clouds of the very fine dry toner powder into the room. Everything in the office, including Helen herself, was covered in a thick black film – the computer, the desks, the phones, the carpet – everything! Helen was frantically trying to clean it up, with little success – every movement caused a new release of a cloud of sooty powder. It turned out that the stranger on the phone was a visitor, dropping something off, who had happened upon the sooty-faced Helen in the office, and was trying to help! Realizing it was safe to do so, she escaped.

We joked about not having a camera with us – the sight was absolutely unbelievable. I phoned the committee to tell them not to come to collate the Newsletter, but asked Pat to bring her camera round – which she did. David (Rev Dodge) arrived, and was amazed at the appearance of the normally smart Helen, and her office. Pat, Helen and I eventually cleaned up most of the mess. The picture above was taken after Helen had washed her face a couple of times, and, using baby wipes, kitchen towels and a vacuum cleaner, we’d cleaned up the outside of the printer cabinet.

 We refilled the printer’s toner cartridge, so we could complete the printing of the center pages with a reasonable, if a little sooty, result, and a professional was called in to deal with the bowels of the printer for future use. Our trusty sexton, Steve (of “You Need Steve” fame) arrived to complete the office cleanup. The Connection will get collated and mailed a day late, but should arrive at everyone’s house before that first Sunday of the month as promised.

No, life as a News Committee member is never dull! Wouldn’t you like to join us? As a Reporter you’d be collecting the news items: as a Collator, you’d help us fold, collate and sort the Connection ready to mail; or you could help in both capacities; or, if you know Publisher, you could join us as an Assistant Editor . We would certainly use and appreciate all the help we can get. Call chairperson Pat Grahame at 778-7308 or me, Beti Turner (Editor) at 772-3041 if you’d like to join our gang and have some REAL fun!

May the Spirit of the true meaning of Christmas be with you all, this Christmas and throughout the coming year!